Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Meme Schmeme

Well, it was only a matter of time before I got tagged. I suppose it's Karma or Irony or some such thing since I once made fun of them. But how can I turn down someone as charming and gracious as IzzyMom? Since this one seems marginally less dorky than some I've seen, I'll happily join in. I'm told Dooce did it, and I suppose what's good for the Dooce is good for the Gander, er..Antagonist.

Six Weird things about me:

1. I have double jointed elbows and they will bend so far in the opposite direction that it freaks people out. For that reason, I don't often demonstrate this skill. It really serves no purpose, except I suppose I could more easily free myself from a straightjacket, if the need ever arose.

2. I am addicted to butter. Hey...I grew up in Wisconsin, it's a dairy state. I put it on everything. I cook everything in it. Or I did, before I changed my ways to shed some post-smoking, post-pregnancy, post-dance-every-night-single-life weight. Once, while visiting my parents, we took my husband to a local pub type place that is moderately famous for it's hamburgers and fishburgers. My husband was horrified to find butter dripping from his double cheeseburger. Now you see how I acquired said addiction.

3. I can't sleep in a bed with clean sheets if I haven't had a shower. Even if I showered that morning, I must shower again. It just seems WRONG to put a dirty body into clean sheets. Likewise, I cannot put on pre-worn anything after having a shower, even if I only wore it for a very short period of time prior to the shower. Particularly underwear and socks. My boys and my husband have no such qualms.

4. I have a weird matching quirk, which sometimes manifests itself in very peculiar ways. For instance, I must use the same brand of shampoo and conditioner. I cannot use Paul Mitchell shampoo, and Biolage conditioner. I will, in desperation, but it bugs me. A lot. I can't use B&BW lotion, and then some use some unrelated fragrance. If I wear Cotton Blossom lotion, then I must use Cotton Blossom body splash. When my boys were younger, I used to dress them head to toe in the same name brand. I simply could not mix a Carter's shirt with a pair of Oshkosh B'Gosh pants. I know, I'm a loon. Needless to say, eclecticism is not a concept that I embrace, except when it comes to music.

5. I don't like foods to mix, unless they are supposed to, as in the case of a casserole, or lasagne, or something of that nature. If I am served mashed potatoes, peas and Swiss Steak, they should not, under any circumstances, enter my mouth, together. Some people have a thing about foods touching on their plate but that's really fine with me unless it's something really gross like, beet juice soaking my dinner roll. But something about combined textures in my mouth makes me queasy. (save's all been said before by my pervy husband)

6. I habitually pick the mascara off of my eyelashes. I have done this for as long as I can remember. Sometimes, I put on extra coats of mascara just so I can pick it off. I think it started when I wore glasses and my eyelashes, which are very long, would rub against my glasses and leave specks on the lenses. I would pick the mascara just off the tips, at first, to prevent that, and it just progressed from there. The older I get, the more sparse my lashes become, so these days I try to wash my mascara off before the picking compulsion overwhelms me.

Alright, now that I have revealed myself to be a complete nutcase, I'll go back to posting things that make me seem all normal and highbrow and stuff.

M and Kirdy, you've been tagged. Don't hate me. Izzy made me do it.


  • At 9:27 PM, Blogger Kimberly said…

    I'm with you on the clean sheets. I am so anal about that.

    Butter - notsomuch. However, my Nana is. She butters both sides of her bread when she is making a sandwich. ICK. Bologna, cheese, mustard and butter??????? Something's wrong there.

  • At 9:40 PM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    My sister puts butter and peanut butter on pb&j. I draw the line there, lol.

    Glad I'm not the only clean sheet freak out there. ;?)

  • At 9:55 PM, Blogger Mom101 said…

    Nos four five and six...I am with you! although my matching thing is a little more aesthetic. I have to buy the shaving cream in the same color can as our shampoos so that everything in our bathtub is, say, green.

  • At 10:14 PM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    GET OUT! You're a mascara picker too? I've never met anybody else who (confessed to) did that.

    I would love to match product colors. Alas, my husband and boys are hopelessly indiscriminate in this regard. I am helpless.

  • At 11:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I tagged you specifically because I sensed you would be anti-meme BUT I do feel like I know the enigmatic BA just a bit better than I did before ;)

    And I would love to see you do that double-jointed thing...

    Thanks for humoring me!

  • At 8:33 AM, Blogger nina michelle said…

    I feel the very fabric of the universe has been rent today....tsk tsk tsk....BA YOU playing tag?

    after a bunch of self examination I realize that much of my weirdness revolves around socks and Jody Foster... it was quite enlightening actually.

  • At 10:55 AM, Blogger MrsFortune said…

    Butter burgers!!! Truly one of the seven wonders of the world. Damnit, I'm freakin' hungry now. :-)

  • At 12:32 PM, Blogger Kirdy said…

    Now I want Culvers. Dammit.

    And I wanted to use your #4 for my #4, but that would have been cheating. even though it was my hangup first, dagnabit.

    As for the mascara picking, yet another reason to try Kiss Me mascara. The whole "tube" pulls right off the lash without damaging it. Sheer genius.

  • At 7:05 PM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    Izzy, I'm not really enigmatic. There are plenty of folks out there who think they have me all figured out, lol.

    Don't tell anyone, but I enjoyed it. Thanks for including me.

    M and Kirdy, thanks for humoring me too!

  • At 7:30 PM, Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said…

    I never realized (until this meme) that there were so many women out there with the same idiosyncracies... I, too, am a mascara picker. It goes along with the eyebrow pulling and the skin peeling. If I don't watch myself I'll be without eyelashes, eyebrows and patches of skin. Gross, I know, but I'm glad I'm in good company.

    Was that oversharing?

  • At 12:12 AM, Blogger Kacey said…

    I'm a scab picker. I can't go to bed dirty in clean sheets. Same with dirty/clean clothes. I have a problem with symmetry. I also have a problem with rules of 3, 5, 7, etc. You know, nothing on display in even numbers. It once took me and a friend 6 hours to decorate a Christmas tree. We worked very hard to make it perfectly un-perfect. I have a problem. Well, okay, lots of problems. Thanks for your list of 6. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I hope this revelation of myself does not hinder anyone from visiting me. I can be a little over the top, but I will try to keep it to a minimum. For now.

  • At 11:19 AM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    Mrs. Chicky, there is no such thing as oversharing when it serves to make me feel like less of a nutjob. Thnak you!

    T&T I drive my husband completely berserk with our Christmas Tree every year. I've learned to relaxe a little because my harping and critiquing made decorating the tree very un-fun for everybody else. But I still go and surreptitiously reposition things. I can't help it. Thank to you as well!

  • At 7:39 PM, Blogger Wendy said…

    Hey! Me too!! With the sheet thing. My husband balks. And the shampoo thing, I have relaxed in my elder years a bit with the brand matching, although it still enters my head...especially with the kids', if they are clean and unholey...score!!

  • At 9:10 PM, Blogger Blog Antagonist said…

    LOL, nursevl. I'm with you. My youngest has been dubbed "Pigpen" so I too consider clean clothing in one piece a victory.


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