Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Well It's Something....

And yes, it's an anecdote.

But frankly, I think it's perfectly hilarious, and since it's the weekend and the blog pickens are usually somewhat slim, perhaps you won't mind that my content today isn't as....cerebral.... as I had hoped it might be following my resolution.

Shortly before Christmas, while leisurely browsing in Target, secure in the knowledge that my shopping was done, I happened upon a trifling little item that struck me as perfect for Husband.

I already had a gift, but it was just so him, that I couldn't resist. And so, it found it's way under the tree and when he opened it, he laughed.

It was a desk calender titled "Dumb Office Dares".

~For a full day, holler "PHONE!!!" every time a phone rings.
~During a meeting, conspicuously sniff both armpits.
~Put a beverage in a paper bag and casually sip from it throughout the day.

You see, while most people would probably read them, perhaps guffaw, and then discard them, Husband is the type of person who will actually do them. And he has a couple of co-workers who will happily aid and abet hiim.

Not only will he do them, but he will get away with them.

Husband is well liked, for one thing. But he's also fairly....relaxed, in terms of his social graces. Though highly intelligent and very good at playing the professional game when he needs to, at heart, he's just a good ole country boy, and the people he works closely with understand that.

So when he does something unconventional, people simply accept that as part of They just shake their heads and smile indulgently. They all but pat him on the head for his waywardness.

It helps that he works for a very small company, in a fairly intimate office setting. Certain protocols are ignored and most office etiquette is eschewed for a friendlier way of relating to one another.

Still, there are limits to what people will put up with.

Yesterday, the daily dare instructed him to take his garbage to a colleague's office while said colleague is present and dispose of it in their garbage without saying anything.

Husband is one of a handful of people that have been with the company since the very beginning nine years ago. He chose a woman who is fairly new to the company, having been hired only about nine months ago. As a result, I suspect, she is still figuring Husband out.

So, without preamble, he waltzed into her office, garbage can held aloft. He made his way around her desk and nudged her chair wordlessly, indicating that she should move. Which she did. He then extracted her garbage can and ceremoniously upended his own into it while she looked on in stupefied amazement.

As he exited she couldn't contain herself and said sarcastically, "Uhh...thanks for the garbage."

He turned, gave her a grin and a thumbs up and then left, in response to which she could be heard to mutter, "Ooooookay."

Husband returned to his own office where a conspiratorial co-worker was straining to contain her giggles.

He left the office shortly thereafter without enlightening her, though I feel certain someone else must have. I've met her twice and she seems the type to enjoy a good joke, even if it's at her own expense, so I'm not terribly worried.

Not all the dares involve a victim. But I told Husband that when they do, it might be a good idea to leave the page on the desk of the daree, with a note thanking them for being a good sport.

Otherwise, he might find himself on the receiving end of some not so good natured retaliation, particularly since the company often employs foreign contractors who might not necessarily understand or appreciate the American sense of humor.

I wouldn't want Husband to be branded an infidel for absconding with someone's stapler.

That would really suck.


  • At 6:06 PM, Blogger said…

    Snickering over here... Yeah, alerting them to the year of pranks to come might be a good idea...

  • At 7:14 PM, Blogger Lara said…

    that is hilarious. maybe i should look into getting one for my friends who work at google. of course, it's not something i can ever do, since my "office" is a house and my "coworkers" are a two- and four-year-old. ;)

  • At 7:54 PM, Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said…

    Your husband and I would get along just fine. I've never met the man but from this and the other things you've said about him he sounds like a good one. You lucky woman.

  • At 9:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I just love that sort of randomness. I'm not sure I'd have the guts to pull it off at work though. But I was that kind of fun in college.

  • At 10:07 PM, Blogger Amy Y said…

    I'd totally do those stunts, too, but could NOT keep a straight face... so I'd ruin them. You should see if you can get one of your hubby's co~workers to get one of the pranks on video for us to watch. I'd love a good giggle :)

    You are a fantastic story~teller, Mama.

  • At 11:56 PM, Blogger flutter said…

    Oh I love him!

    I might have to get that calendar for The Boy, it sounds right up his alley.

  • At 3:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like it. Every workplace should have someone like your husband, someone to lighten the mood a bit so things don't get too serious. A few of my colleagues could do with some of his humour!

  • At 7:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Too funny! Would love to have been a fly on the wall, but, with your description of events, it was like I could see it happening! Thanks!

  • At 11:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I love that he nudged her aside to do it.


  • At 12:34 PM, Blogger Girlplustwo said…

    someone at my work got that same calendar - and the one who got it went around and formed a pool, getting everyone who was interested to sign up for a day in the year, and they'd get that dare unbeknownst to anyone else, and have to do it, and if they didn't, they'd lose the pool. pretty hilarious stuff.

  • At 8:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Lord knows that the business world could use a good laugh. The seriousness of it all was what drove me to start my own thing.

    Nudging her was classic.


  • At 9:38 AM, Blogger Unknown said…

    Oh My Heavens!!!! I want one of those only, "Dumb Stay At Home Mom Dares". ::SNORT::

    When I worked in an office -- I would do the dumb stuff... and giggle only with myself. I was the short nerdy one that no one would suspect... so I got away with a LOT! Oh me... sigh... thanks for the great read -- and the fun laugh!

  • At 11:39 AM, Blogger anne said…

    This is great.

    And inspiring!

    As I alway say, messing with your co-workers is the best reason to have a job.

    Ok, I don't always say that I but I practice it religiously.

  • At 4:00 PM, Blogger sltbee69 said…

    That is too funny! That's the kind of office I'd love to work in.

  • At 11:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I gotta get me one of them calendars!!!


Post a Comment

<< Home