Blogs Are Stupid

Doesn't anyone believe in Dear Diary anymore? What happened to the joy of putting actual pen to paper? And why does every ordinary Jane and John think they can write well enough to burden the world with their scribblings? It’s a mystery that badly needs solving. My first entry contains my thoughts about blogging and will set your expectations. The rest will probably be stream of consciousness garbage, much like you’ll find on any other blog. Perhaps we will both come away enlightened.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Stop Thinking and Write

Thanks to everyone who commented to let me know they're still hanging around.

I just want you you to know that it was less about you guys, and more about me. I realize I didn't express that well.

I came off as whiney and needy, and that wasn't my intent at all.

I think every blogger hits that point where they start to wonder if maybe they've just run out of things to say. If maybe, they've reached the threshold of their ability to be interesting and entertaining, and....relevant.

So really, that post was about my dissatisfaction with myself, rather than with my readers. I always thought that if I couldn't write anything meaningful, I would rather not write at all.

And I haven't written a whole lot of anything meaningful lately.

I know that for a lot of you, blogging is just a thing you do. (and I don't mean "just" in a diminishing sense, but more like "just" in a non-defining sense) You're a person who blogs. Just're a person who mows their lawn. Or a person who takes a shower.

But for me, my written words are a reflection of my identity as a writer. And if what I write is inane crap (which, at least one person seems to think it is)....that creates an identity crisis of sorts. It feels like a personal and creative failure.

Which is stupid, I suppose, considering that I am just another blogger, not a Pulitzer prize winning novelist. Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill, eh?

But it is what it is. there a point to this post?

I guess I just wanted to let you know that it's not you, it's me.

I'm not going to hang it up because truthfully, I would miss blogging far too much. I've done that before only to come crawling back looking like a giant horse's ass.

I just need to figure out how to make Blogs Are Stupid interesting again.

There are blogs that I used to read religiously, that I truly loved because they were interesting and different. But then slowly, as they gained more readers, they became very mainstream. The dildo jokes got more plentiful and the meaningful content more infrequent. They began to rely on the easy laugh rather than post the good stuff that really takes some effort.

And it does take effort. So I get why that happens.

But I stopped reading.

And I wonder about people that I no longer see here and I wonder...have I become "that" blog?

I don't want to be "that" blog.

Shit. I hate it when I get all introspective. It rarely leads anywhere I'm truly desirous of going.

Maybe I should just stop thinking and write.


  • At 6:46 PM, Blogger S said…

    ahh, overthinking.

    i know it well.


  • At 7:15 PM, Blogger Green-Eyed Momster said…

    Writing is my therapy. It's a way to get things that bother me out of my head. I think it's healthy. I also like to be entertained. I find myself more drawn to blogs than TV shows these days because of the real people. I'm new to all of this and I've found the amazing people that I needed to find in only 4 short months. I think readers come and go in cycles too. Keep that in mind. You do have a great writing talent and style. Don't forget to make it fun for you too!! Hugs!

  • At 7:27 PM, Blogger Life As I Know It said…

    It does take effort, you're right. Which is why I could never blog every day or sometimes even every other day. I only publish a post when I have something to say, which lately is infrequently.

  • At 7:29 PM, Blogger Fairly Odd Mother said…

    Hell, I wrote about fish today. If anyone sticks around to read that, I'll eat one (kidding! be kind to animals and all that!).

    I can't imagine not wanting to read your stuff. I may get behind in posts and have to skip a few, but I always come back.

  • At 8:01 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I've been reading faithfully for months..... I've commented only a couple of times because I know NOTHING about blogging and I rarely have anything meaningful to add. But I LOVE reading your blog, I check for posts each time I get on the computer (daily). And since I've only known about your blog since January or so, I spend a lot of time reading your archives. You are so smart, witty and entertaining. I'm amazed at how well you take what SEEM to be mundane events and extrapolate the human, meaningful parts and give us all some perspective. Don't you dare stop the blog....I'd be devastated.

    On a separate topic, I know you like reading and are always looking for new stuff. I just finished THE GLASS CASTLE by Jeannette Walls. It's a fantastic memoir - but it's NOT new and, being the avid reader that you are, you may have already read it.

    Anyway - I've passed your blog off to friends who I know will enjoy your talent so you may have dozens of readers you aren't aware of. I don't know if comments are your only way of counting (again, I know NOTHING about blogs) but if so, I'm certain the number of comments is FAR less than the number of readers.

    Keep writing.

  • At 8:07 PM, Blogger Middle Girl said…

    I understand what you're saying and how you feel. There seems to be a cycle to this sort of emotion.

    If blogging is something you love to do, you will find your voice and that somethng, something.

    Yeah...and don't forget to have fun, heck...have a blast!

  • At 8:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I know exactly how you feel. I've wanted to hang up my blogging boots many times, but I like having something that gets me writing everyday.

    I'd take your worst post over ten of my best, by the way.

  • At 10:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You haven't become THAT blog. I was wondering a few weeks ago where all my readers had gone, too. But I think this blogging thing is cyclical and you have slow weeks and better weeks. It seems like there has been a lot of lurking and people reading posts in their Readers lately, so you probably still have the same readers, you just don't see them, you know?

    Ugh. Most incoherent comment ever. Just wanted to give you my support and let you know I'm lurking about.

  • At 10:35 PM, Blogger Girlplustwo said…

    babe, i've had my head up my ass this week, it's not you, it's me ;)

    writing for oneself, it's hard and easy and well, it's what pulls us through. your voice, we'd be lost without it.

  • At 10:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Is it bad that I am likely to read MORE if you write about sex toys?

    Numbers are falling off all over the place these days. I like to think it's quality, not quantity that counts.

    And, you've got ME baby!

  • At 10:58 PM, Blogger flutter said…

    paralysis by analysis

  • At 11:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I love your writing - I looked at a few blogs a few months ago to see what it was all about - and lucky me - I found yours fairly quickly.

    I really do LOL at some of your entries and cry at others(even when it is NOT that time of the month).

    I am always glad that I invested the time to read you. Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing.

  • At 11:20 PM, Blogger Jammie J. said…

    Thank goodness. I'd hate to think you were giving us foreplay and then breaking up with us because we wouldn't put out.

  • At 7:48 AM, Blogger Avalon said…

    I have tried hard not to enter the 20th circle of hell.........the one where I get all affected by readership. Because truly, if the over-riding theme of my life, and therefore my Blog is to say " I don't really give a shit what people think", then I would be lying to myself and everyone else.

    I say, write what you want when you want. If it interests you, if it amuses you, if it relieves you to Blog it, readers and commenters be damned.

    Most of us will still be here.

  • At 8:27 AM, Blogger KT said…

    It's not me, it's you? Are you breaking up with us? ARGH!! Don't stop blogging.

    Truthfully, I enjoy your deep (for lack of a better word) posts and your "mundane" ones. I wouldn't use mundane, but I think you did. Your posts that seem mainstream or silly are just as entertaining. Hell, we can't all be Jack Handy every day, with the deep thoughts. You are a mom with things that distract you. You are a women who wants to write about sex toys (i kid, i kid). And that is who you are, and that is what I like reading about. I like reading about one person's thoughts. All of them. from what kind of coffee they like, to what thhey think about gay marriage. From stories about the diamnond in your navel, the baseball parents you sit with, to your recently found sex drive, to your lesbian mom friend who is the perfect mother in your eyes. It's all entertaining. You might not think it is, but I sure do. And I hope you never stop writing. If you do, you better publish a book so I can go buy it.

    My blog is a diary of sorts. I have found it therapeutic to write my thoughts. I suppose I have maybe 5 religious readers. Sure I'd love to have more. It's sorta a validation isn't it? But I have enough stresses in my life. I can't add that too.

    I realize you are a writer and it's probably more important to you, that you do this thing VERY well. But if it means anything, coming from little ole me, who is new to the blogosphere, I think you do it very well, on all topics. And I read everyday. I don't comment everyday, but I am reading it regularly.

    Keep up the good work.

  • At 8:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm in the same place you are right now. I don't have a whole lot to say, so do I just put up some funny story about the kids? Do I write stream of consciousness? Do I pose a pithy question? Or do I go into some of my mental minutiae and write about some things that are troubling me?

    I haven't written since last Friday. I'm still not sure what to say. I know that feeling of not wanting to pander to an audience, but wanting to make the writing have substance as well as keep people interested. It's a balance. One I think you pull off well. Just write. We'll read.

  • At 9:33 AM, Blogger Sarahviz said…

    I'll always read you, BA!

  • At 10:30 AM, Blogger sltbee69 said…

    No, you aren't that blog. That blog is my blog. I know I can't write for shit but keep it going because I don't want to seem like a stalker commenter. You are a very talented writer and I believe that whatever you write, mundane or not, it will still be entertaining. That's why I check this blog every day, sometimes 3 or 4 times a day, to see if you have something new to say.

  • At 10:37 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think it's time for some change. Your blog is stale. I like your blog but I am tired of looking at that ugly woman with the huge lips! Please, change your layout! Do something new. It might help :-) I'm not bashing, just trying to help.

  • At 11:34 AM, Blogger Shelley Jaffe said…

    It's not you, it's me? Oh, ho! We've heard this one before. I completely understand your post today - and I wonder if I am one of the posts you've dropped. I'm kind of on an exploration a little myself - and it can be a slippery slope. When I'm serious, I hear that I'm too depressing. When I'm funny I don't feel meaningful enough. I have really got to get an agenda together. Because if I were to presume to say I was a little like you, I would say that I write not just as another item on my "to do" list; I try and make a small difference. To someone. It just can't be The Catcher in the Rye everyday, you know?

  • At 4:17 PM, Blogger Amy Y said…

    Shut up and write, wouldja? :) You'll never be uninteresting and I definitely understand where you're coming from. You have a talent. You are expressing yourself creatively. Your voice is important.

    My blog, like many others, is just a blog. Just another thing i do. It's something I enjoy doing... but it was started more of a journal and a way to keep in touch with family/friends back home. Funny thing is, most of my readers (that I'm aware of, anyway) now, have never met me in real life. So it's evolved into something different.

    But regardless of the ups and downs ~ which we all have ~ and the occasional lack of content or writer's block or just having no time to blog... when you do write, I'm reading and I'm always glad I did.

  • At 6:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    sitbee69 can't be the "stalker commenter" because that's me :-)

    BA, I read you faithfully, regardless of your subject, because it's always interesting and usually insightful, and always worth my time.

    I gave up blogging after only a few months, because I find that I'd rather read others' blogs and comment - it feels more like a ...conversation, I guess, to me, even though most bloggers don't comment back in their comments. Most do read their comments though, so anything I have to say feels less like spitting in the wind and more like it has reached at least one other human being :-)

    Thanks for all your posts, deep, "mundane", other. :-)

  • At 8:52 PM, Blogger Woman in a Window said…

    You have a very unique voice. I'd hate to see it disappear.

  • At 7:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    "I think every blogger hits that point where they start to wonder if maybe they've just run out of things to say. If maybe, they've reached the threshold of their ability to be interesting and entertaining, and....relevant."

    For me, thats , like, every other day. :-D

    Love your blog!

  • At 8:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Don't stop! I love your site..

  • At 4:16 PM, Blogger Namito said…

    Hey there,

    No. You will never be that sort o' blog.

    My intermittent commenting has everything to do with moving in less than two months, life with an Impling NOT in preschool, but hanging out here, and my own attempts at completing various and sundry projects that have started and grown tremendously well in my brain, but not in any sort of real, tangible way.

    And of course, it's all about me. You all know this, right?

    The balance. It is hard to find, and harder to keep. For what it's worth, I still love reading you.

    So there.

  • At 11:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    First of all: blog depression. Google it and read the pamphlet, it's hilarious. It was posted on a blog called the nonist.

    Secondly: we all go through this, and there does indeed seem to be a widespread numbers dip going on, so don't take it personally. The worst thing you can do is assume that you can control your readers by being a 'good enough' blogger, and then when the readers go, it leaves you thinking you aren't 'good enough.' Readers come adn go for all kinds of reasons that have little or nothing to do with the writing or with you, so if you enjoy the process you just have to ride it out and keep doing your best.

    This is what I tell myself, anyway.


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