Girldom; A Paradox

If you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that I am as girly as the day is long. I loooooooooove all things girly. Make-up, nail polish, shoes, purses, clothes, jewelry, perfume...

What's funny is that people who only know me from my blog or other internet locales are often surprised to find this out. I guess I am perceived as someone who would eschew such frivilous things; someone who views pursuits which do not edify as pointless and indulgent.

Conversely, those who only know me in real life, are often surprised to find that I am capable of abstract thought and that I have interests other than interior design and fashion. Occasionally, when I venture to express an opinion on something more cerebral, I am met with looks of thunderstruck amazement.

Why is that? Where did this stigma come from? Why do people think that smart girls can't be attractive and attractive girls can't be smart? Why are girly looking girls assumed to be superficial dullards?

I rarely leave the house without make-up and hair done, and I've never been a t-shirt and sweats kind of gal. I always accessorize, even if I am dressed casually. Usually, it's minimal; gold hoops, my wedding band, a favorite bracelet. I don't wear athletic shoes unless I am exercizing.

Also, I am reserved in social situations, which is quite common where I come from. Northerners are less effusive by nature, though no less freindly, really. But here, I am either percieved as being "aloof", or socially and intellectually maladroit. Slow. Simpleminded.

I was recently discussing this with a friend who lives in Texas. She and I are definitely kindred spirits and sometimes think so much alike that it's almost frightening. I remarked that she, however, is much more outgoing than me. She expressed the belief that Southerners seem more outgoing, even if they are not, because it is deeply ingrained in them to be friendly, polite, and garrulous.

So, with all of those things combined, that it is often thought that I must not be terribly bright; at least by Southerners.

So I like that here, I am perceived as someone who thinks.

But...today I'm tired of being cerebral. I want to talk about something fun and frivilous and girly today. If you come here for highbrow stuff....I apologize. But everybody needs a change of pace now and then, no?

Inspired by Flutter's post yesterday, I am going to share ten of my favorite frivolous things.

1. The color orange.

Or any variatioin thereof; coral, peach, terracotta. If you look in my closet, it's almost comical how much my love of this hue is reflected in my wardrobe. I recently splurged on a pretty spring sweater at Coldwater Creek along with a matching necklace. Husband laughed at me when I modelled it for him. Why?

Well because...



And...




By the way, I bought this sweater two sizes smaller than I would normally wear because it was incredibly...voluminous. Like, Mrs. Roper voluminious. I bought it so the hem sits just below my natural waistline, skimming my hips. Things draped over my plentiful behind only create the impression of tentiness, which I like to avoid at all costs. Also, I painted the button with about 47 coats of coral nail polish because I didn't like the brown. I felt that it limited my accessory options.

2. Smelly stuff; household

My tastes change frequently. But right now, my favorite household scent is Vanilla Lavender. I use Tide Vanilla Lavender laundry detergent and fabric softener. Febreeze makes Vanilla Lavender fabric refresher which I use with abandon. Yes, I know it's probably poisoning my family and the environment, but what isn't? Suave makes a very affordable Vanilla Lavender body wash, which I buy in bulk for fear it will be discontinued before my obsession wanes.

I am completely in love with Vanilla Lavender tarts, which are wickless wax patties that you melt in a tart burner with tealights. It infuses the scent throughout your entire home. Yummy.

The more I look, the more products I discover. I am not one who does things halfway, and obsession is no exception.

Recently I found this, and of course, I shall have to posess some of that delightfully purple soapiness soon:



3. Smelly stuff; personal

Again, my tastes change frequently. Not long ago I was completely besotted with Vera Wang Princess, but I'm over that now. It was nice, but a bit too...timid. It just wasn't me. It didn't last very long on me anyway.

Then I discovered this:Launched in 1995, Burberry Classic posesses a blend of peach, apricot, amber, sandalwood, cedar and musk. It is recommended for Daytime Wear.

And this...
Launched by the design house of Aquolina in 2004, Pink Sugar posesses a blend of cotton candy, caramel, raspberry, bergamot, licorice, fig leaves, orange, strawberry, and oak.
And this.Pink lotus petals enveloped by a golden piece of precious amber. Seductive. Rich. Beautiful.
Fragrance Top Notes: Bergamot, Wild Berries, Succulent Plum.
Fragrance Mid Notes: White Rose NP, Orange Flower NP, Lotus Petals, Iris.
Fragrance Base Notes: Amber, Creamy Sandalwood, Vanilla, Patchouli, Praline, Musk Captive.

The Burberry, rather than being timid, is subtle. It's a lovely, soft, daytime fragrance and it is unique. The Pink Sugar will make your husband or significant other want to eat you. Literally. It sounds very sickly sweet, but it isn't. It is deeply warm and sensually sweet. The Sensual Amber is sex. Period. If you can wear this and not want to crawl between the sheets and roll around, you are clearly olfactorily challenged. The same goes for the person smelling you. I wear this when I need some serious bowchickabow-ow.

4. Make-up; lips.

I love lipstick. I am never without something on my lips. That's partially because I am very pale and though my lips are full, they don't have much natural pigment. I tend to look somewhat cadaverous without lipstick. But also, I just hate the feel of bare, dry lips. The other day, a bottle of water that was not capped tighly leaked all over my purse. I had to take everything out to let it dry. Husband picked up my little see through pouch of lipsticks and said in bewilderment, "Baby, WHY do you have that many lipsticks? You only have ONE pair of lips!"





Believe it or not, this is about a quarter of the number I actually posess. This is just what I carry with me. But you girls know...you have to have your pinks, your corals, your nudes. And every gal has to have at least one perfect red. Then you have to have your glosses, your creams, your mattes, your frosts, and your liners. One must have a suitably versatile lip wardrobe. But I can't expect a man who owns three pairs of shoes and who thinks that any two shades, if they are in the same color family, match, to understand this.

5. Make-Up; Eyeshadow

I love eyeshadow almost as much as I love lipstick. However, I don't wear as many different shades. I stick with about 5 or 6 color combinations, most of them pretty natural and/or neutral looking. I feel kind of silly wearing a smoky vampy eye to the grocery store. But I have about a billion shadows, just because I can't resist a gorgeous shade.

My most coveted brand of eye shadow hands down, is Bare Escentuals mineral eye shadow. The thing I like about BE shadows is their versatility. You can apply them wet (called "foiling") or dry to change the intensity. You can use them as liner by creating a paste and applying with a fine liner brush. There are several shades that I use as blush, eyeshadow and lipcolor for a very natural look.

Most of my mineral shadows last at least a year. Some pots I have had for 3 or 4 years and are not yet even half gone. The nice thing about mineral make-up is that because it has no binders, fragrance or preservatives, it will not spoil or harbor bacteria if stored properly.

My most favorite shade of all time is Vanilla Sugar. It's the only shade that I've used multiple pots of, because it is my base shade for all others. It can also be worn alone on days that you are going for a minimal look. A little Vanilla Sugar, a quick swipe of eyeliner and some mascara, and you are ready to go. And, you can use it as a highligher wherever you want a little extra glow. Sometimes I even use it beneath my eyes to brighten as well. I have horrible dark circles and sometimes they need a little extra camoflage.

It's a very pretty neutral peachy shade that is like skin, but better. It has a pearlescence to it, but is not a frost or a shimmer. This is an amazingly versatile product, and one which I cannot live without. It is definitely a staple in my make-up wardrobe.

6. Make-up; face

About five years ago, I discovered mineral make-up and now, I cannot wear anything else. I've strayed a time or two, only to find that I can no longer tolerate the heavy, masky feel of liquid foundation. Not to mention that my skin, which is very oily and prone to breakouts, stays clear and fresh when I use mineral make-up. The moment I put liquid foundation on my face, I break out.

It used to be that Bare Minerals was my brand of choice. However, though I've always considered it very high quality, I have been less than pleased with the "glow" that it imparts. For some women, this is the very reason they like it. But for an oily skinned gal, it was not a selling point. I usually solve this problem by purchasing a shade darker than I need and mixing it with equal parts cornstarch. This really increased the volume as well and gives you much more bang for your buck.

Recently, however, I discovered Everday Minerals. They have several formulations so that you can customize your look; Intensive, which is a full coverage finish, Matte, Semi-Matte and Origianl-Glo, which I imagine is very similar to the glowy finish of Bare Escentuals.

I am always skeptical of mineral knock-offs, but this brand received very good reveiws on Makeup Alley (I never buy anything without checking there first).

They sell samples and starter kits for a very reasonable price, so I decided to try them. And to my surprise, found that this is a very high quality product.

I did not like the Intensive formulation. It's very heavy coverage and didn't do well on my oily skin. The Matte was very nice medium coverage, but buildable. However, I didn't like the completely flat finish. The Semi-Matte turned out to be absolutely perfect for me. The coverage is natural, but hides what I need it to hide. It is not flat, but really has no discernible glow either. Just a nice, fresh, dewy look. I will be ordering a full size just as soon as I finish up what I'm using now.

Mineral make-up has a definite learning curve, but you don't need all the potions, primers and creams to "prepare" your face as they purport. I'll tell you a secret. I have very large pores in my t-zone, and they do tend to stand out more with mineral make-up because it doesn't fill in like liquid make-up does. BUT...you don't have to spend $35 for half an ounce of Photofinish by Smashbox. Go to the feminine care aisle at your local drug or grocery store. There you will find a product called Monistat Chafing Gel. It has the EXACT SAME ingredients as Photofinish, but costs....$6.99. I have a tube that I've been using for 2 years.

Some people have had good luck with Milk of Magnesia, applied very sparingly with a cotton ball. Another option is a layer of pure cornstarch applied with a flocked sponge prior to application.

Okay, on to....

7. Purses

For years, I carried a diaper bag, and so, gave very little thought to my actual purse. I just carried a large wallett type thing that I could stash in the diaper bag. But, as happens when children grow older, I suddenly found myself freed of all the trappings of infancy and toddlerhood. And I rediscovered my love of purses.

I like big purses. I carry a lot of crap.

Sadly, I do not have a lot of disposable income with which to indulge this love. I have no Coach or Kate Spade in my collection. But I find that Target is great for a purse snob on a budget. Except for those dumb little Isaac Mizrahi handbags. I mean...all his handbags are four feet long and two inches high. Now those are great if I need to carry my dildo collection with me, but for most other practical purposes, they just don't make the grade. Plus, most of them are ugly.

For Christmas husband bought me this wonderful Ralph Lauren Tote:




As you can see, it is a fairly sizeable bag, and yet, it is bulging at the seams. As I mentioned, I actually cleaned it out fairly recently. You sure wouldn't know it, would you? Shall we take a look at what is in my purse today?


-Wallet
-Portfolio (also bulging at the seams)
-Package of Handisacks
-Orthodontic Rubber bands
-Lipstick pouch
-compact
-Umbrella
-Two pairs of sunglasses
-Hairbrush
-iPod, monster cable and headphones
-Altoids
-Pens
-Tylenol, Pamprin
-hand lotion, hand sanitizer, hairspray, Carmex
-Cell phone
-The belt to my son's baseball uniform
-Camera (in use)

Not included in photo; four feet of coupons and receipts from recent trip to grocery store, one granola bar wrapper, one banana skin in a ziploc bag. Five Starbuck's napkins.

8. Cake; Beef

I have a definite "type". Dark. Swarthy. Brooding. Mysterious. I rarely ever develop infatuations with blondes. Well, unless you count Shaun Cassidy when I was 7. These days, my tastes run more to this:


And, this...

And, this....

And, this.


Delectable, no? Of course, none of them can hold a candle to my own dear Husband, who rocks my world. He is the total package.

9. Cake; Batter, Birthday

Actually, I'm not much of a cake person. Baked goods aren't usually my thing. However...Bruster's Birthday Cake and/or Cake Batter Ice Cream can throw me into a hedonistic frenzy. Seriously, this stuff is like crack. I don't even need a cone, just give me a trough and a spoon. Right now, it's my absolutely favorite indulgence.
10. Outlander Series by Dana Gabaldon

Now, I don't consider books in and of themselves to be frivolous. But these particular books are just plain fun. There is no deep thought required. There is no heavy philosophical or theological message. It's just pure pleasure. This series is about a woman; Clair Randall, who inadvertantly travels from post 1943, to 1743. In so doing she encounters Jamie Fraser; a Highlander. Of course, they fall in love, leaving Claire in a bit of quandry, as she is already married to Frank Randall in 1945.

The rest is your standard bodice ripping, bosom heaving, member throbbing romp, complete with a damsel in distress, who is smart and beautiful, but tough as nails, and a white knight in the form of a brawny but senstive Highlander. However, it is slightly more highbrow and erudite than your average Harlequin. There is history, culture, political intrigue, battle, discovery, adventure, and of course, romance.

And there is some damn good sex. There are several notable scenes that will leave you decidedly...amorous.

Husband finds Jamie to be a highly implausible albeit undeniably likeable character. Well of course he is. That is why he makes us swoon. He is perfect.

I love everything about these books. I've read the entire series twice through already and I will probably do so again soon. Husband is currently reading them at my insistance, and discussing it with him is giving me a hankering to travel back to Inverness ca. 1743.

Dana Gabaldon sure knows how to spin a yarn. I've heard talk of a movie, but I don't know how they could ever fit 7 books (new one out next year, YAY!) into a bearable time frame. And I don't know how they would ever find anyone perfect enough to play Jamie.

Here's a fun video mock-up that someone did, but I can't say I agree with all the casting choices. I quite like Kate Beckinsale as Claire, but Jamie is much more handsome than the gent in this little production. I doubt there is a face in existence that can do the character of James Alexander Malcome McKenzie Fraser justice.




There now, wasn't that fun? Screw the environment, the presidential race, the war in Iraq, NCLB, religious dogma, and people being nasty to each other.

I needed that.